How To Deal With Impossible People

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How to Deal With Impossible People

We all know impossible people. They tend to share three main characteristics - they cannot be reasoned with, they believe they can do no wrong, and they are convinced that everything is someone else's fault. If you haven't had some first-hand experience in dealing with such people, even a brief conversation can raise your blood pressure through the roof. Here are some insights and steps for dealing with these highly difficult people.

I just want to see if Israel could apply this, in the interests of peace.

In shortened form, here are the 12 steps--let's see if any are relevant:

1. If you think you might be dealing with an impossible person, you're probably right. [note to self: ignore world opinion]

2. It doesn't matter how this person interacts with others. The fact is, the way they interact with you is terrible. [and the UN Security Council recognized this and blasted Hizbollah yesterday, so there's hope]

3. If you're dealing with an impossible person, you're probably being told on a regular basis that every conceivable thing is your fault. It isn't. As the saying goes, "It takes two to tango." [Actually, the saying is "cycle of violence", but why quibble]

4. Give up all hope of engaging these folks in any kind of reasonable conversation...Chances are, every such attempt ended in you being blamed for everything. [worse, it ended in the Oslo Accord! And Oslo II!! And the Road Map!!! And the Rafa Accords!!!!]

5. If you have regular dealings with someone who tries to portray you as the source of all evil, you need to take active steps to maintain a positive self-image...Do NOT defend yourself out loud, however. It will only provoke the impossible person into another tirade. [doesn't anyone believe in hasbarah?]

6. Guard against anger...Anything you do or say while angry will be used against you over and over again [try explaining that to the Knesset].

7. When the impossible person becomes hysterical (and they probably will, as this is a common trait among them), immediately "Turn off" any serious consideration you had been giving them [No good. Israel hasn't be able to break off talks for more than a week or two at a shot].

8. Give up self-defense. Understand very clearly that you cannot beat these people. [Huh? Who let Labor in here?].

9. Understand that eventually, you and the impossible person will have to part ways [Ah, a two-state solution].

10. Avoid letting the impossible person make you into a "clone" of them. If you aren't careful, you could find yourself adopting many of the behaviors of the offender. [only Israelis can be accused of being terrorists]

11. Be a manager. Until it is over, your task in the relationship is to manage the impossible person, so that they do less damage to you [What? Another pro-Disengagement advocate?].

12. Realize that impossible people engage in projection [you mean like Kassam rockets? Oh, those are projectiles...]. Understand that you are going to be accused of much (or all) of this behavior yourself.

Among the warnings they give:

Do not make impossible people angry; although they (of course) "have no temper" and are "reasonable to everybody," the fact is that if you enrage them, they will blow their stack like you can't believe. [actually, they become an absolute terror]

No, on second thought, I don't this is going to cut it. Besides, Fatah, Hamas, the Al Aqsa Martys Brigade, etc are not impossible people, freedom fighters, or militants--they are terrorists. And the first step in any kind of program in dealing with a problem is to admit to what the problem is. Seems like the UN, the EU, and the US are not even up to the first step.

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